Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Apparently
I pay for the lack of snack.
I've noticed that when I purchase a large bag of peanut m&ms (for economy and because I love them so) I tend to not pay attention, as I work, to how many m&ms I eat. Also, usually when the munchies strike me it is not with enough force to cause me to get up from my desk and wander to the vending machines downstairs, and I simply continue working. When I have the large bag sitting in my desk drawer, it magically seems to wander out next to my computer and suck my hand right in. Therefore, if I simply buy a small bag from the vending machine when I am so possessed I will be healthier and richer than if I keep a large bag within reach. It may cost more per m, but it is the better way.
Which brings me back to where I started: the thought that some peanut m&ms would be nice right about now...
I've noticed that when I purchase a large bag of peanut m&ms (for economy and because I love them so) I tend to not pay attention, as I work, to how many m&ms I eat. Also, usually when the munchies strike me it is not with enough force to cause me to get up from my desk and wander to the vending machines downstairs, and I simply continue working. When I have the large bag sitting in my desk drawer, it magically seems to wander out next to my computer and suck my hand right in. Therefore, if I simply buy a small bag from the vending machine when I am so possessed I will be healthier and richer than if I keep a large bag within reach. It may cost more per m, but it is the better way.
Which brings me back to where I started: the thought that some peanut m&ms would be nice right about now...
Wednesday, July 02, 2008
Sequel
No, not sql. That's different, although there was some of that going on at work today as well, at least indirectly.
Late 20's, single, LDS, living in Utah. There's some pressure to get married. So I date. Without going into my entire dating life, I'll say that I had an interesting revelation just now. I was sitting on my couch thinking about my lunch date today and realized that one of the best things in dating is when I can see that I've made someone's day. Thinking back about when I asked the girl out yesterday for today's lunch I remember her smiling. After I left, she may have been gushing excitement (if she was interested in me), or she may simply have appreciated that someone asked her out (I've been given to understand that girls appreciate that). Wherever she fell on the continuum, she did smile. My point (lest the reader mistakenly think that this is simply hopeful romantic rambling) is not whether or how much she may or may not be interested in me. It is that I realized sitting on my couch this evening that there is something about making someone happy (whether a little or a lot, so long as it is real) that is very rewarding. For example:
She was working into the evening. A corner of the offices she worked in was hugged by an L-shaped hallway. The longer hall where the service windows were was wide enough for a walkway on either side of a freestanding stair in the middle going up to the second floor. Under the stair were some bench seats facing the windows. Earlier, on a whim, I decided I should get her a flower. My style has long been a single red rose with no green florists' tissue or greenery. Just a rose.
I held the flower below the counter, out of site as I approached her. She smiled and we greeted each other. She would close the window and come out on the short side of the hall, around the corner. After she left, I sat on the bench seats. Presently, I heard the door close and I arose and walked towards the corner. I held the rose mid-stem, flower up and behind my forearm, out of sight. She came around the corner and I turned the stem in my fingers, the flower curving back, down, around, and up towards her. "This is for you."
The next few seconds were one of the highlights of our relationship, at least for me. She was clearly elated. It wasn't the thanks or even the secondary benefit of a stronger relationship that such a romantic gesture can help cultivate. It was seeing someone happy and knowing that I had caused it. I felt I had achieved something fundamentally meaningful.
On the evening President Hinckley passed away I was in a fireside meeting listening to a speaker talk about an empty cup he had brought with him as a visual aide. He talked about how we all have a metaphoric cup. Sometimes we are needy and go around hoping others will fill it. Occasionally someone graciously does fill our cup. But the best way (and in the end the only real way) to have our cups filled is by filling others'. It seems almost backwards, but as we give to give, and not to receive, we do receive, and much more and much more meaningfully than if we were focused on our own needs. I gave her the flower not so I could feel good, but simply to please her. Making her happy made me happy, but only because I was focused on her, not me.
Maybe this seems a bit nebulous and philosophical. But the results of how well people grasp the abstract ideals and concepts of living are evident in the more concrete details of day-to-day life that we are much more familiar with. Our problems aren't "just so" - unattached to causes tied to basic standard ideas. If things go well, they do so because you make the decisions that lead to things going well. Very simple, but easy to forget, and easier said than done.
The usual ordeal of nervousness, mustering courage, stepping out of my comfort zone, and being willing to plan and pay for a date was a small price and well worth it to put a smile on the girls face yesterday. The date itself went well. I'll probably ask her out again at some point. But whether it leads to something serious and wonderful, or if it was just a nice one-time lunch date, it was a success in my book if only for the smile.
Late 20's, single, LDS, living in Utah. There's some pressure to get married. So I date. Without going into my entire dating life, I'll say that I had an interesting revelation just now. I was sitting on my couch thinking about my lunch date today and realized that one of the best things in dating is when I can see that I've made someone's day. Thinking back about when I asked the girl out yesterday for today's lunch I remember her smiling. After I left, she may have been gushing excitement (if she was interested in me), or she may simply have appreciated that someone asked her out (I've been given to understand that girls appreciate that). Wherever she fell on the continuum, she did smile. My point (lest the reader mistakenly think that this is simply hopeful romantic rambling) is not whether or how much she may or may not be interested in me. It is that I realized sitting on my couch this evening that there is something about making someone happy (whether a little or a lot, so long as it is real) that is very rewarding. For example:
She was working into the evening. A corner of the offices she worked in was hugged by an L-shaped hallway. The longer hall where the service windows were was wide enough for a walkway on either side of a freestanding stair in the middle going up to the second floor. Under the stair were some bench seats facing the windows. Earlier, on a whim, I decided I should get her a flower. My style has long been a single red rose with no green florists' tissue or greenery. Just a rose.
I held the flower below the counter, out of site as I approached her. She smiled and we greeted each other. She would close the window and come out on the short side of the hall, around the corner. After she left, I sat on the bench seats. Presently, I heard the door close and I arose and walked towards the corner. I held the rose mid-stem, flower up and behind my forearm, out of sight. She came around the corner and I turned the stem in my fingers, the flower curving back, down, around, and up towards her. "This is for you."
The next few seconds were one of the highlights of our relationship, at least for me. She was clearly elated. It wasn't the thanks or even the secondary benefit of a stronger relationship that such a romantic gesture can help cultivate. It was seeing someone happy and knowing that I had caused it. I felt I had achieved something fundamentally meaningful.
On the evening President Hinckley passed away I was in a fireside meeting listening to a speaker talk about an empty cup he had brought with him as a visual aide. He talked about how we all have a metaphoric cup. Sometimes we are needy and go around hoping others will fill it. Occasionally someone graciously does fill our cup. But the best way (and in the end the only real way) to have our cups filled is by filling others'. It seems almost backwards, but as we give to give, and not to receive, we do receive, and much more and much more meaningfully than if we were focused on our own needs. I gave her the flower not so I could feel good, but simply to please her. Making her happy made me happy, but only because I was focused on her, not me.
Maybe this seems a bit nebulous and philosophical. But the results of how well people grasp the abstract ideals and concepts of living are evident in the more concrete details of day-to-day life that we are much more familiar with. Our problems aren't "just so" - unattached to causes tied to basic standard ideas. If things go well, they do so because you make the decisions that lead to things going well. Very simple, but easy to forget, and easier said than done.
The usual ordeal of nervousness, mustering courage, stepping out of my comfort zone, and being willing to plan and pay for a date was a small price and well worth it to put a smile on the girls face yesterday. The date itself went well. I'll probably ask her out again at some point. But whether it leads to something serious and wonderful, or if it was just a nice one-time lunch date, it was a success in my book if only for the smile.
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
Forget Roller Coasters
If you need an adrenaline rush, try something that puts you far out of your comfort zone where the worst that could possibly happen is that you might succeed. (And I mean that patently tongue-in-cheek.)
